| BOYS OVER FLOWERS (Korean Ver.) |

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

i want to read a book, but i have no leisure time
i want to sleep for a long long time, but i can't , there's too much things for me to do
i want to write a story, but i have no time and no abilities
i want to stop studying for a long time, but i am not clever and i can't
i want to sing and dance, but i just dun hav the talent
i want to be perfectionist, but i juz dun have big brains like some ppl
that sums up my life, life is full of sadness for me, full of unhappiness and i want to get out of it
there are things that i want to get rid of in this world but is difficult
being blur
being not talented and retarded
long long long hours in school
betrayers, esp ppl who pretend to like me
backstabbers
elitism, esp ppl who are snobbish and arrogant
ppl who dislike or hate me
yup n tat's it
i noe its offending at the last part, sorry, i apologise

;;6:46 AM

Saturday, April 30, 2011

jc life now is fun as i learn chemical bonding. though it is difficult in the beginning , but seeing each chemical substances with different types of bonding, it is amazing, chemical bonding is difficult but interesting.
for bio, i learn cells to dna to later protein synthesis. looking at cell and molecular level, it is like unlocking mysteries, isn it? just as chem n bio are fun, maths is killing me at times, although sometimes i enjoy maths. maths is so difficult, trying to figure out things, n not juz plain memory work and noe the formula alone, thinking skills are required, i think i'm not adapt to it, so my maths cmi. I failed my lecture test one, 9 out of 27, only one pass in my class. however, i passed my functions test, and got a B , the highest ever for all my tests. APGP is so difficult, haiz...
btw, i miss my sec sch n pri sch a lot , n the sch i miss the most is edgefield primary school. back then, i have a lot of good teachers, and very nice frens. although there are times when we are unhappy with people, we do not bear any grudges, that is a good human nature.
but in secondary sch is different, i learnt to know that true frens are hard to come by, and i learnt to cherish my frens that i hav, even though it is little. i have to appreciate the things that i have, as when i grow older, there are less good things to have, and the only word is cherish.

;;9:36 PM

Thursday, April 7, 2011

now sch life is still ok, e-learning is over, family day is over, and now i hav to study for some small tests and mid yr common test. talking bout common test, i was looking forward to it, and also not looking forward to it, it's contradicting. good thing is to see where my standard lies but bad thing is to see the reality, doing badly. i'm worried for all subjects and aim to pass 2 H2 chem n maths cos i find concepts easier to understand and less key words. i think i hav to make a study timetable cos there is project work now n i would be busy n also practise harmonica. i also nid time to meet my sec sch best frens, i miss them a lot, and they are still in nchs sec 5, and they are also busy cos they are preparing for their o levels. hope that they can do well in o levels. and i nid time to catch up with my hobby, to find a japanese drama to watch and hear more japanese and korean songs. if not i will be a nerd... and that's it for today.

;;4:58 AM

is perfectionism the only way to success? this is the question that i have ask since primary 6 going sec 1. sometimes i want to be a perfectionist, but being perfectionist is an unachievable goal for me, given my condition, honestly, i am a blur person who makes mistakes easily and there is little time for me to be as i have tonnes of homework waiting for me in my secondary school days and even now. until now, i am still asking myself if being perfectionist is the best thing to do, although sometimes i tell myself or even deceive myself it's enough when i do my best alr. Why i like to be a perfectionist? to me, it gives me security and more confidence. I dunno how others feel what is needed to feel secure and confident. sometimes, i think , if i'm perfect, everyone in the world will like me and i have the chance of having more frens and even have more best or true frens, so that i feel secure and confident. i dislike the feeling that ppl dislike me. Besides, having the urge to become a perfectionist will make me hardworking, having the determination to do well in studies and other non-academic stuffs. but, being perfectionist may not be a good thing after all. sometimes , i tend to become very fake ,and try to be someone else in order to be perfect, and even more ppl dislike me and somemore hate me. besides, i will get more stressed and pressurised, so instead of doing well in life, i started to do badly in everything and even get depression. and i experienced it when i was in sec 2. and because of this, i slashed myself. so whether to be a perfectionist or not, i still stuck at this qns...

;;4:06 AM

Saturday, March 19, 2011

this is my new blog, the 3rd one. btw, the 1st one was deleted, the 2nd is private n this shall be open to public.

i hav nvr post in my private blog sine december last yr. so in jan 2011, i receive my o lvl results. l1r5 is 11 for raw, after deduction is 7. i choose ajc, but initially i want to go sp biomedical science. i nvr regret my choice of entering ajc but i am very scared of my promos at the end of this yr, i really really really dun want to retain, i want to be promoted.

as for ccas, i join harmonica band in ajc, the first time joining performing arts. secondary sch is nchs npcc, which i love it a lot n nchs npcc is a place for me to learn, to enjoy, to be myself, to lead n most importantly being with my closest frens in npcc as well as adding colours to my secondary sch life. i also love campcraft competition in 2008 n 2010 although we do not get into top 10 position. i really want to be junior officer in nchs npcc but my mum dun allow. i really want to help to serve the unit as how the unit has helped me to become a better person.

some of u may be wondering what subjects i took in jc. i take maths,chem,bio n general studies in chinese. i love bio so i take it n i hope to go biomedical science or biological science degree in nus.tats why i hav to work hard n smart for these two yrs.

the post shall end hear. i will post when i am free next time. see u.

;;10:38 PM